Child Abuse Story From Carrie
by Carrie
( Ireland)
I guess I was never going to have a good start in life. My dad was 30 years older than my mum. She was still like a baby when they married. My mum grew up in a children's home where she was abused and raped by priests.
I don't really remember when the abuse started really, ever since I can remember. At first I didn't notice what it was. When my dad showed me his private parts I was shocked. I thought it was funny and even laughed, he had done it in such a normal manor.
After awhile he started to sneak into my room at night where he would start fondling me. He told me it would be our secret, that it would make me special from the others. I guess when he realised I wasn't going to tell he started selling me out to people he knew, including my half brother who was 16 then. When they started to rape me I knew it was wrong cause it hurt so much. I still didn't say a word, and then when I was 7 I was taken into care, only to be sent home because the staff couldn't handle my behaviour. I was a scared wild child who had never been anywhere but my house so I ran away. I lashed out at everyone until they were scared of me.
When I was sent home, my dad was still there and things went back to the way they were with him, but they changed with my mum. It was like she couldn't cope with having her other children in care so she started drinking a lot, which gave my dad and his friends more access. Things got really bad and I couldn't take it anymore. The abuse, my mum drinking, their fighting, so I started cutting. I didn't know what it was I was doing. I was only 8. My mum was pregnant again so had to give up drinking, but that didn't make things better.
I went back into care at 9, but wasn't there long as my dad was able to keep kidnapping me. Finally when I was 10, I was taken into care for good, but it was worse. I moved from place to place, still being abused by people. I even got pregnant once after been raped but I miscarried. I lost it then and kept trying to kill myself. I was then diagnosed with PTSD and was sent to a mental hospital after trying to kill myself 5 times.
Since then, I have been out of hospital for a year but I did try to commit suicide again 2 months after I got out. Every day is hard, even just getting out of the bed but I know I have to keep going and not let them win. I'm bringing my dad to court and hopefully he will never get out of jail and my story will have a happy ending.
Note from Darlene: The volume of contributor submissions has now made it impossible for me to comment personally (especially in great detail) on each and every contribution. If I haven't left you a comment or one that is in-depth, please do not take my lack of a personal response as a slight, or as a statement that your story is somehow unworthy of my time. Nothing, and I do mean nothing, could be further from the truth. If there was a way for me to respond to all of you at length, I would.
Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited, and could result in being banned from making further comments on this site.
