Child Abuse Story From Brenda1

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Child Abuse Story From Brenda1

by Brenda
(Location Undisclosed)

I was 8 years old when the sexual abuse from my Grandfather began. I am now 18 and a first year at university and I am only just realising the effects of what that evil person did to me had. My work and achievements are good, I have always been a good academic student, even if I never felt that I had done well. The thing I find most difficult to deal with is not being able to interact with people how I want to. It is always a struggle for me to talk to people and I don't let anyone get close. It also doesn't help that I have self esteem issues and not much confidence. I didn't realise until recently that most of these things is due to the abuse I received. So I would like to thank you for the information on this website.

The abuse went on for about two years and although actual sex never happened, I was fingered and touched almost every weekend and humped and was once given oral. I know this has scarred me because I was almost unable to do these things with my ex-boyfriend of 3 years. I told him about the sexual abuse and so he didn't push me into anything. But I recently just found out that he only stayed with me for so long because I had 'problems' and he wanted to help me, as opposed to what he told me, that he loved me. None of my family know and it will stay that way because it would destroy what little is left of them. My parents divorced when I was 14 and hate each other now so my immediate consists of my mum and brother. I also have no friends who I feel I can talk to, but I have just started having counselling sessions and I'm pinning all my hopes on that they will work. I would just like to be normal and not run away from social and intimate situation any more. I think talking about it, or writing about it really helps, as I feel a bit better now.

Darlene Barriere: author. speaker. survivor. coach

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Child Abuse Story From Brenda1

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Feb 08, 2010

Brenda:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

I'm so glad that you found the information on this site helpful. But I am delighted that you've chosen to enter into counselling in order to help you through the residual of what you endured as a child. I will say this, your grandfather is very likely STILL molesting other young girls. So I strongly recommend that you report your grandfather. Yes, I understand that you don't want to destroy what little bit of family you have left, but you must ask yourself if you would you be able to live with yourself if you found out that another little girl suffered the same fate you did and that it could have been prevented by disclosing. You see, molesters don't change their ways, they don't stop, until they are made to stop.

Brenda, I have no doubt that counselling will help you because you have such a strong desire to address the repercussions of sexual abuse; that is absolutely key as you journey along your own path of healing and recovery. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir

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Feb 08, 2010
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Submitted by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Title

Comment
I'm so glad that you found the information on this site helpful. But I am delighted that you've chosen to enter into counselling in order to help you through the residual of what you endured as a child. I will say this, your grandfather is very likely STILL molesting other young girls. So I strongly recommend that you report your grandfather. Yes, I understand that you don't want to destroy what little bit of family you have left, but you must ask yourself if you would you be able to live with yourself if you found out that another little girl suffered the same fate you did and that it could have been prevented by disclosing. You see, molesters don't change their ways, they don't stop, until they are made to stop. Brenda, I have no doubt that counselling will help you because you have such a strong desire to address the repercussions of sexual abuse; that is absolutely key as you journey along your own path of healing and recovery. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me. <img src="http://www.child-abuse-effects.com/images/DBbookiconvictimtovictory96x97px.jpg" alt="From Victim to Victory, a memoir" align="left" hspace=12 vspace=2> <font size="1">Darlene Barriere Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com author. speaker. survivor. coach <a href="http://www.child-abuse-effects.com/my-story-of-abuse.html" title="From Victim to Victory, a memoir"><i>From Victim to Victory, a memoir</i></font></a>

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Feb 09, 2010

ALWAYS BELIEVE IN YOURSELF: DON'T QUIT OR GIVE UP ON YOURSELF
by: maurice

Brenda 1. Great you found Darlene's Site. She sure is over the moon about it as she told you in her comment. She's knows well now that her vision to set it up has proved to be a blessing to hundreds from through her from on high (GOD) It is a safe place for you to now begin your journey of healing. Your Grand-Father ruined your life. you know that now. You have articulated it eloquently in the telling of your story. Hi Brenda 1 Darlene has given you courage in her loving words from her heart to you. So begin today by taking action on what she advised you to do. You're one brave and big woman now to tell your story. Would you want another Child/teenager to suffer the way you have over the years because of that bad man, abuser/molester of children. I have no doubt you will give yourself the right answer. Darlene has encouraged you to tell on HIM I CAN: I WILL: I MUST: I love myself enough and I sure know you care enough about other children. Please don't delay for there sakes. Always believe in yourself. Be brave, be strong and persevere at getting healing for yourself and other children who might be abused by this man. Build up your own self-esteem. Have a healthy mind in a healthy body. Become active and alive with others your own age in Team sports and cultural groups. Take a natural way of making aquaintance and friends building up your own self worth, self giftedness, tallents in the company of others. It will be a breath of frsh air and a new outlook for you. You'll be fine have no doubt about that. So off, off your bottom, get out and about, intergrate and mix with work mates. Think Positive, Act Positive, Be positive in all you do and say in your every day living. Look in the Mirror, see the wonderful and beautiful ME in it. looking back at that beauty. be gentle and kind on yourself and that body of yours. erase the memories, the scars of your Granfather on you. Rid the world of hime by telling on him. dirty old man. Darlene gave you a big steeping stone to build your future life from. Counselling will help you, if you trully are genuine/sincere and true to yourself you will. Have a healthy mind in a healthy body.

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Feb 09, 2010
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Submitted by: maurice

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Brenda 1. Great you found Darlene's Site. She sure is over the moon about it as she told you in her comment. She's knows well now that her vision to set it up has proved to be a blessing to hundreds from through her from on high (GOD) It is a safe place for you to now begin your journey of healing. Your Grand-Father ruined your life. you know that now. You have articulated it eloquently in the telling of your story. Hi Brenda 1 Darlene has given you courage in her loving words from her heart to you. So begin today by taking action on what she advised you to do. You're one brave and big woman now to tell your story. Would you want another Child/teenager to suffer the way you have over the years because of that bad man, abuser/molester of children. I have no doubt you will give yourself the right answer. Darlene has encouraged you to tell on HIM I CAN: I WILL: I MUST: I love myself enough and I sure know you care enough about other children. Please don't delay for there sakes. Always believe in yourself. Be brave, be strong and persevere at getting healing for yourself and other children who might be abused by this man. Build up your own self-esteem. Have a healthy mind in a healthy body. Become active and alive with others your own age in Team sports and cultural groups. Take a natural way of making aquaintance and friends building up your own self worth, self giftedness, tallents in the company of others. It will be a breath of frsh air and a new outlook for you. You'll be fine have no doubt about that. So off, off your bottom, get out and about, intergrate and mix with work mates. Think Positive, Act Positive, Be positive in all you do and say in your every day living. Look in the Mirror, see the wonderful and beautiful ME in it. looking back at that beauty. be gentle and kind on yourself and that body of yours. erase the memories, the scars of your Granfather on you. Rid the world of hime by telling on him. dirty old man. Darlene gave you a big steeping stone to build your future life from. Counselling will help you, if you trully are genuine/sincere and true to yourself you will. Have a healthy mind in a healthy body.

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Feb 09, 2010

Thank you
by: Brenda 1

Thank you for your comments. My grandfather is dead now, he died last year. I can't be sure but I don't think he abused any other girls after me. Maybe before but then the only other girls he was near moved away. I don't know whether I regret not telling someone about it because I think it would have totally destroyed my mum. She is already very protective and if she thought she had let this happen then she would not deal with it well. I really hope councelling helps and I can erase the memories and have a normal life with normal relationships. He may have ruined my life up until now, but I won't let him ruin the rest of it. I'm not a child anymore and I'm in charge of my life now. I really do feel better now I have spoken about it, so I would like to thank Darlene again for this amazing website. :)

Feb 10, 2010

You will OK.
by: Anonymous

Its a good thing you are seeking counselling. Hopefully you will come to realise that most people in this world are trustworthy. You are obviously an intelligent young woman with your life ahead of you. Take each day as it comes, it may be a slow road to recovery but you will get there with the right help. Concentrate on creating the kind of life YOU want for yourself. What other people have done is beyond your control. Keep up with your studies and try and be positive. What I also think is helpful is to get involved in charity/volunteer work. You will meet lovely people doing this.

Feb 11, 2010

Good on YOU, That determination will make you the winner
by: maurice

Brenda 1. It will take you time but let all that awful disgusting man etc did to you. He ruined your life. Great you are now in counselling and with your determination that he is not going to ruin the rest of your life you'll begin to live your life to the full. Hi. one day at a time. Have a healthy mind in a healthy body. I will do it, I can do it, I must do it. Because I am worth it now. Great you have a mammy that is a true mother to you. Brenda 1 you are now in charge of your own destiny. Read Darlene's loving comment to you, take ownership of her re-energising suggestions to you. She is truly a winner over abuse. From victim to Victory is exactly what she is. Our hero with her website. I join with you in your acknowledgement of it. It is a haven of healing for each of her visitors.

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Child Abuse Story From Brenda1

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Child Abuse Story From Brenda1