Child Abuse Story From Bells

by Isabella
(New Zealand)

I was about 7 or 8 when my uncle started touching me. He would find a way to get me alone whenever we visited him.

I've always been a very happy girl and my parents are supportive in everything I do. I can tell them anything but there are few things that I can't tell them.

One time, we were visiting my uncle and my brother and I had to stay the night because our parents were going somewhere. I slept on the couch in the lounge. My uncle went out and came home again at about 2am. I was hoping that he wouldn't come and touch me again but he did. He lay next to me and told me to be quiet and not to say a word. His hands moved to my breasts and I tried to push him away. He got angry and held my arms with one hand and the other went between my legs. I whispered and told him to stop with tears running down my face. He told me to shut up and he bent my fingers back and broke 2 of my fingers. He had his c**k in my mouth so that I couldn't scream much. He slapped me across the face and left me there crying.

I am 14 now and live an almost normal life. The abuse stopped as I am not allowed to see him anymore because he is addicted to weed and all he does is talk bs now.

Even after the abuse stopped, my life was still hell. My best friend died and I got really depressed about that. Then I got raped by a 22 year old... I can't tell anybody about that either.

I act happy in front of my parents everyday so that they don't see my real feelings. I went to a school councillor one day when I was feeling really depressed. I told them that I get depressed and I tried to commit suicide once. I decided not to end life because there was too much to live for. I left, not feeling any better and when I got home my mom sat me down and asked me if I was depressed. The coucillor had called her after I left. My mom forced me to tell her what was wrong so I told her I was depressed because I got bullied (which isn't completely a lie but it doesn't compare to the s**t I've been through).

I still haven't told my parents about the abuse and rape but I have a supporting boyfriend and he knows what happened and he makes me feel happy. He makes me forget what happened and for that I am thankful. I know people have been through a lot worse and I just want to say stay strong, find something that makes you happy (maybe a hobby, sport or anything to keep you busy). It really helps the healing when you do something instead of being alone and not doing anything at all. =]

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