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Child Abuse Story From Anonymous

by Anonymous
(United Kingdom)




I don't really know if I have been physically abused, but it seems like it is the case. I was born in England. I have one brother who is about 2 1/2 years older than me. I just remember whenever we were naughty, instead of being told off and being sent to our rooms, my dad hit us with a belt and started swearing at us. He would also hit us and leave marks. No one at school said anything, but I faintly remember my mum saying one of the neighbours came asking if we were ok.

When I got a bit older, maybe about 7 or 8, my mum and dad got divorced because he used to get violent, smash mirrors tried to hit my mum over the head with a pan, and was always swearing and screaming.

Then when I was with my mum, if we made her mad she would start swearing and would drive off in the car (I don't no where) for about an hour, and leave us in the house by ourselves. I remember her saying she wishes we were never born and we were a big mistake.

One time we were in the car, I can't remember what we did, but she got real angry and drove dead fast. I was really scared. She said she'd had enough and was putting is in-care. She never did though.

Also, I remember waking up in the middle of the night when I was about 9 to my dad screaming and swearing, trying to kick the door down of our house. Luckily the police came and put him in the cells overnight.

Anyway, that's about as much as I remember, and like I said, I'm not sure if it was abuse.

Darlene's comments are at the link below.

Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in visitor comments are strictly prohibited.




Comments for
Child Abuse Story From Anonymous

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Jan 23, 2008
It was abuse...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Today, in some countries, (Canada, for example) beltings—especially beltings that leave lasting marks—is considered physical child abuse. But that's a legal definition that doesn't cross borders. It's reasonable to call it abuse when neighbours were concerned for your well-being.

However, there is no question you were emotionally abused by BOTH your mother and father. My types of emotional child Abuse page on this site offers more detailed information about what constitutes emotional abuse. The additional links I've included below will take you to the specific spots on that page for the information. Witnessing domestic violence is a form of terrorizing. The abject fear the child is experiencing in the moment that it is happening is extremely damaging psychologically. It is life-altering for the child. It leaves the child feeling hopeless and helpless. Children blame themselves for all that goes wrong in a home. They believe they are responsible. That is the nature of being a child. Of course, none of what happens in an abusive home is the child's fault. None of it.

One of the worst things a parent can say to a child is "I wish you were never born" or "You were a mistake" which is saying the same thing. Some children never recover from these hateful messages. This falls under the emotional child abuse category called rejecting.

Check out my physical child abuse pages for more details about physical abuse, including a comparison of abuse vs. discipline. You'll find them on the navigation bar in the left margin of this page.

As for what you lived through, you didn't deserve such brutal treatment. You didn't deserve to witness your father's violent tendencies. You didn't deserve to have your mother tell you she wished you were never born. You didn't deserve to be belted for misdeeds. You didn't deserve to be threatened with being placed in-care. You DESERVED loving, caring and nurturing parents who got along with one another, parents who were lovingly united in teaching you and your brother right from wrong, but in guiding and respectful way.

Have you considered counselling to help you deal with the emotional residue of what you grew up with?

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

Jan 24, 2008
hii
by: Anonymous

i had the same problem with my mother when i was about 3-8

Jan 29, 2008
i am sorry for u
by: Anonymous

That is emotional abuse. Try to block those incidents out of your head like they never existed. Do some yoga. It wikll give you mind and body relaxaton.

Jan 29, 2008
just like you
by: Just like you

pretty much this is what is happening to me right now. except my dad doesn't hit my mom with pans. my dad constently throws things at us [my siblings] at a high rate of speed. im really sorry for you. i'm going through the same thing right now. im 14. its probably been happening since i was 9?

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