Child Abuse Story From Amanda
by Amanda
(Illinois, USA)
It all began when I was six years old. My stepdad came home from work and he was in one of his "moods". He took it out on me. We got into an argument. I wanted to go to bed because it was already 10 o'clock at night and way past my bedtime. He got mad because I told him I didn't want to clean my room right then. I don't really remember what happened next, other than the fact that the next morning I had a bruise on my face the size of a grown man's fist. My mom asked me what had happened, but I was too scared to tell her, so I told her I fell down and hit my face. She didn't look convinced, but I guess she bought it because she dropped the subject.
From then on, it seemed like everything I did angered him and somehow made him so furious that he felt the need to beat me by slapping my face, spanking me to the point where I couldn't sit down, and once I told him "No" when he was mad and he threw me into the staircase and nearly broke my back and neck. I couldn't walk straight for two weeks.
But one day, he made a mistake and pushed me down to the ground in front of my mom. Well, they always fought after that, every time she saw me with new bruises or cuts or scratches. But every time that she wasn't home or she was at meetings for work, he would get mad and blame their fights on me. Then he would hit me again and again. This continued until my mom had enough. She began divorce proceedings. My stepdad got so mad, and he blamed the divorce on me. He didn't just physically abuse me; he abused me verbally, emotionally, and mentally as well. It took me two years before I told my mom about the previous abuse because I was so scared of him. To this day, I still am.
I went through three different counselors, one for the divorce, one for the abuse, and one for the depression and stress. I still see one for depression and stress because I still have to visit my stepdad every week and every other weekend. Each time I see him, he makes me feel so worthless and insignificant, that I come home in tears and then I won't eat and I won't sleep.
After ten years of putting up with the abuse from him, I decided that I am no longer going to be scared of him...I will no longer be afraid to stand up to him and fight back when he tries to make me feel bad. I will not let him win anymore. He took my entire childhood away from me and he destroyed my past and present. He WILL NOT ruin my future. I won't give him the opportunity. He doesn't deserve the satisfaction of winning.
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