Child Abuse Story From AlwaysAnonymous

Child Abuse Story From AlwaysAnonymous

by AlwaysAnonymous
(USA)

I can't hide this in any longer. When I was around 2, I used to self inflict myself. Then, my dad and mom started beating me. First they just told me to take off my bottoms-underwear and all. Then they hit me with the metal part of the belt. But then they hit me with bats, slippers, poles, wood things, anything they could get hold of. I thought it was normal to get hit, and that it was my fault why I was hit. But, it seemed to get worse. Like one day, again, I don't know why.

My dad hit me against the doorknob and made my mouth pour out blood. Then he told me if I were to tell anyone, I would get in even more trouble. Then he would hit me against the wall, slap me across the face, and even punch me. Then my parents started having late shifts and my cousin started to babysit me.

Everything was as usual, all the beatings before I got there, the beating when I got there, but then there was the night time. My cousin began touching me. I was four at the time, and didn't think it was wrong. But he wouldn't stop and kept on doing that. I told him no, but he kept going. Then he went all the way. This happened several more times as he so-called 'baby sat' me.

I started getting depressed. I even told my parents, but my parents just said I was mental and that I needed help and that I didn't deserve to live and have this great family. I started cutting myself. I even made several attempts to kill myself. But I couldn't because it was too selfish of me if I did that. The school found out about me cutting myself, but I had this feeling that I had to protect everyone, so I lied and said some random showed me how to do it and I liked it. Ever since then, my parents have been emotionally abusing me. They tell me I'm not worth it, that I'm fat and I need surgery. I'm only 14.I'm living this lie-telling everyone it's all good.

My parents expect me to have A's all the time. If I have lower than an A, they hit me and say you're "stupid as fuck." And I always have A's, except for once or twice. All they say is, "Finally, you're doing something good in your life."

I can't talk to anyone about this, and not only that, I bottle everything in until I burst out, breaking down randomly. I can't ask for help, because I have that need to protect them. All I care about is my brother. My brother even tells lies to them and tells them I hit him, so they spank me and hit me with combs, brushes, whatever, even if I explain to them. But, my brother is somehow the closest thing to me.

Sorry for the long story,

<33AlwaysAnonymous

Reply from Darlene: Your parents are NOT telling you the truth. I think you've come to believe the lies your parents have been telling you. I think you believe you are worthless and unworthy of help. I think you are afraid of your parents and what they might do if you tell. I think you are afraid of what will happen to you if tell. I think these are the reasons you won't get help for yourself.

Remainder of Darlene's comments to this "Child Abuse Story From AlwaysAnonymous" can be found below.

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Child Abuse Story From AlwaysAnonymous

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May 29, 2008

You are WORTHY...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

You are NOT worthless. You are NOT stupid. You are NOT mental. You are smart and articulate and you are definitely worthy. What your parents are doing is wrong on so many levels. You don't deserve to be physically beaten. You don't deserve to be emotionally battered. You deserve to have loving, nurturing, supportive and respectful parents. But they aren't respectful; they're hurtful. And to NOT believe you when you disclosed sexual abuse at the hands of your cousin was the ultimate in betrayal. They should have protected you and kept you safe form harm.

I understand why you self-harm. The pain of the cut is far easier to deal with than the pain of having parents who so badly mistreat you; there's a certain comfort in that. But cutting yourself is also a cry for help. And so is writing to me on this website. I know you want help, and I know you are afraid. It's all a confusing mess in your head right now; this I know and understand all too well, because when I was fourteen, I was where you are. The difference is that when I was fourteen, there were no teachers or counsellors or social workers or organizations willing to help me. Instead of trying to help me, they told me that my parents were having a "bad day" or that my parents were only beating and battering me because they loved me, or worse, because I deserved it. There was one counsellor who tried more than others, though. She tried to encourage me by saying that the best revenge was a good education—I was skipping more classes than I was showing up for. But by that time, the last thing I cared about was going to school. No one was hearing me. No one understood, or wanted to understand. I was so desperate and depressed by the time I was fourteen that I really believed suicide was the only way my pain would end. That's not the case for you.

I urge you to contact Child Help at 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453) in order to talk to someone about the abuse you are still dealing with. They are staffed 24/7 with professionally trained counsellors who will listen to you. They are not a reporting agency, although they can help you through the process of reporting if you decide to disclose the abuse. And you should disclose the abuse. You're WORTH disclosing the abuse. Take advantage of the resources available to you; they're there to help you through this dreadful time in your life.

And just for the record, your story was not at all long; you wrote it the perfect length.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

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May 29, 2008
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Submitted by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Title

Comment
You are NOT worthless. You are NOT stupid. You are NOT mental. You are smart and articulate and you are definitely worthy. What your parents are doing is wrong on so many levels. You don't deserve to be physically beaten. You don't deserve to be emotionally battered. You deserve to have loving, nurturing, supportive and respectful parents. But they aren't respectful; they're hurtful. And to NOT believe you when you disclosed sexual abuse at the hands of your cousin was the ultimate in betrayal. They should have protected you and kept you safe form harm. I understand why you self-harm. The pain of the cut is far easier to deal with than the pain of having parents who so badly mistreat you; there's a certain comfort in that. But cutting yourself is also a cry for help. And so is writing to me on this website. I know you want help, and I know you are afraid. It's all a confusing mess in your head right now; this I know and understand all too well, because when I was fourteen, I was where you are. The difference is that when I was fourteen, there were no teachers or counsellors or social workers or organizations willing to help me. Instead of trying to help me, they told me that my parents were having a "bad day" or that my parents were only beating and battering me because they loved me, or worse, because I deserved it. There was one counsellor who tried more than others, though. She tried to encourage me by saying that the best revenge was a good education—I was skipping more classes than I was showing up for. But by that time, the last thing I cared about was going to school. No one was hearing me. No one understood, or wanted to understand. I was so desperate and depressed by the time I was fourteen that I really believed suicide was the only way my pain would end. That's not the case for you. I urge you to contact <a href="http://www.childhelp.org/get_help" target="_blank" ref="NOFOLLOW">Child Help</a> at 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453) in order to talk to someone about the abuse you are still dealing with. They are staffed 24/7 with professionally trained counsellors who will listen to you. They are not a reporting agency, although they can help you through the process of reporting if you decide to disclose the abuse. And you should disclose the abuse. You're WORTH disclosing the abuse. Take advantage of the resources available to you; they're there to help you through this dreadful time in your life. And just for the record, your story was not at all long; you wrote it the perfect length. Darlene Barriere Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator Author: <a href="http://www.child-abuse-effects.com/my-story-of-abuse.html">On My Own Terms, A Memoir</a>

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May 29, 2008

You are worth it!!
by: Anonymous

Hey, I understand how you feel because I am in the same boat. You are worse off because I was never sexual abused. I have question on this website.
Is it child abuse if I'm not bruised or injured?

I feel the same as you. I attempted suicide and I used to feel like I wasn't worth anything. My mom tells me that and puts me down. I thought it was my fault. My friend has helped me alot. I have not told anyone yet because I am scared to death and don't want to believe it. I am trying to get over that. I will tell someone in the future when I am strong enough and I think you should too.

I just wanted to comment because some of the stuff you are feeling is the same as me. Its normal. I didn't go threw with suicide because i thought it was selfish. Stuff like that...it amazed me how we could be having the same feelings. Take care of yourself because you don't deserve this.

I will be strong and tell sometime soon and I think you should too. You are worth it!!!

Sep 02, 2008

i hear you
by: RACHEL

i know u think theirs no hope but their is...i can relate to you i never talked to anyone about my abuse either... im 22 and have 2 beautiful kiddos ive beed with my husband for 4yrs and still he is clueless on how my childhood was...i have 5 sisters and all of us were abused including my mom. but i think its to late for me to talk to anyone and i regret it. so please talk to anybody your so young and have your whole life ahead of you. i know your a great person dont let them bring you down

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Child Abuse Story From AlwaysAnonymous

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