Child Abuse Story From Allie

by Allie
(USA)

I have two younger sisters. Now they're 12 and 9. I'm 15. About 5 years ago my mom and dad divorced. I was 10 at the time. My sisters were 7 and 4. They didn't understand what was going on with my mom and dad, and from then on we all grew really close to each other.

Not too long after that my mom brought a guy home. He was really nice to me and my sisters at first. He would buy us new toys and take us to fun places, and all of us trusted him. At the time my mom was working two jobs so she could pay for the bills. So her boyfriend would pick me and my sisters up from school and stay with us until 11 at night sometimes. That's when things really started to go downhill.

We had a little toy doctor's kit. We loved pretending to be doctors. One day my mom's boyfriend told us he wanted to show us a new way to play. We all agreed to it because we thought it would be fun. When we did, he pretended to be the doctor and we had to be the patients. He called me into the room first and instructed me to lay down on the bed and close my eyes. I did. That day I was wearing a dress. He pushed it up to the point where my panties were showing. Then told me I had to take them off. That's when I told him we didn't want to play anymore. He said we had to, then pushed me back onto the bed, held me there, and put one of his hands down my panties and he kept telling me we were still playing. I guess he was trying to convince me but it wasn't working. When he tried to put one of his fingers inside of me I basically screamed at the top of my lungs because of the pain, he ended up stopping because it was scaring my sisters (they were still outside the door).

I was scared out of my mind and never told my mom about it. Now over the same year things were just getting worse. He started getting really touchy feely with me. When I was 11 he forced me to perform oral sex on him in the shower for the first time. It happened many times after that in various places. He always told me this: "It's just a game. Don't tell anyone if you don't want me to play with your sisters too."

When I turned 12 the physical abuse was getting worse. He had me, as well as my sisters, scared to even come home from school every day. He would hit, push, and even kick us at times, whether we did something wrong or not. It all depended on his mood that day. If we knew something bad happened with him, we would try to avoid him. If that didn't work, I would always try to protect my sisters. They meant everything to me at this point.

My 13th year was by far the worst year of my life. He proposed to my mom, but luckily they couldn't afford to have a wedding, so they decided to wait until they could. But the really bad thing coming out of this was that we had to move in with him. His house, his rules. It was horrible. Every day I would go to bed praying that I wouldn't wake up the next morning. The abuse got so bad that I ended up having to wear long sleeves in the summer just to make sure my mom didn't find out. My second youngest sister's situation was getting worse also.

She was now 10, as I was when he first started sexually abusing me. She was getting the stares and the unnecessary touches. So I started keeping a close eye on her, and telling her to stay close to me when we were home alone with him. She understood completely but it really hurt me when I couldn't protect her. Soon he started doing the same things to her as he had done to me. He still came to me just as often but things with him started to get more painful.

He started putting things inside of me, and whenever I would cry because of pain, he would hit me, and tell me to shut up or he would bring my youngest sister in and make me watch him do things to her. I was so scared, and soon I would just start thinking about other things while he was hurting me. Sometimes I even fell asleep, which I was so grateful for.

Last year, exactly a week after my 14th birthday, he raped me. My mom was at work, my sister's were sleeping, and I was coming home from a night out with my boyfriend. We had set it up perfectly because he was going to be out of town over my birthday, so we agreed that the next Friday we would go out to the movies. When I got home, my mom's, still "fiancé" was furious. My mom forgot to tell him about my plans so he thought I had just snuck out. When he was sure my boyfriend had left, he knocked me to the floor and dragged me into my mom's and his bedroom. I fought him for a while, but that was getting me nowhere, and it seemed to just be making it worse. So that's where I was raped. Luckily I blacked out after a while...I'm happy for that because it hurt so much.

Maybe like 2 days later, I told my boyfriend. He was so mad that if I had let him, he would have gone over and handled him himself. But I convinced him not too. He comforted me and told me he would take me to see a doctor if I wanted. I really wanted to tell my mom though, because obviously I didn't want this happening to my sister either. I had let it carry on long enough and got my second youngest sister caught up in it too. I felt guilty and disgusting for ever letting this go any farther than the day we agreed to play doctor with him.

I ended up telling my mom. She broke up with this no good scum bag, called the cops, and now he's behind bars. :)

After all of this I felt like I had a huge weight lifted off of my shoulders. I was so happy I came forward. And now that I'm sharing my story I feel even better. This experience has made me a stronger person. Although I do have to say while I was writing this I had to stop every so often to let out a few tears thinking about all that happened to me. Only because I've always tried to avoid thinking about these horrible experiences. But now that I look back at it, I think it's made me a better person.

Knowing that sharing my story could possibly get someone to come forward about abuse, if they haven't already makes me feel absolutely wonderful inside!

I thank everyone on this site for letting me share my story. ♥♥♥

---

Note from Darlene: I welcome you to follow me on my Facebook page at Healing from Child Abuse. When you get there, don't forget to click onto the Become a Fan link. I hope to hear from you there!

Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in submissions and visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited. Please don't include them, as they will be removed.