Child Abuse Story From a Very Sad and Angry Girl
by Name Undisclosed
I'm dying inside. I don't know what to do. I have been abused, but I don't even know if that's what is fueling this depression. I don't even know if this is the correct place to get out what I have to say. I don't know anything anymore. The abuse I suffered was bad, but I do suppose others have had worse done to them. Point is, I am a very sad, depressed, angry person. I have a therapist and I've told everyone how sad I am. Nothing is helping. Right now, I am so ready for death, it's not even a joke. It hurts SO Bad. This pain everyday of my life. It eats away at me. I can feel myself slowly slipping away from any sort of love and happiness. It's like there's a monster inside of me. I feel like I'm dying. And though I have no physical illness, I know that I am dying. When you feel like you have no heart, and no soul, your life is not worth much. I am smart, talented, people say I'm beautiful. I'm on the fast track to graduating high school with honors, I have tons of friends, guys coming at me left and right. But none of it matters. It doesn't make a difference. If something doesn't change soon, I am confident that I will not make it to see 2013. It may sound like I take things for granted, but I truly don't. I am grateful for what I have, but it doesn't change how I feel. I pray night and day. I always pray for things like homeless people, abused people, soldiers fighting at war, general things. Then I pray for everyday people that I see during the day. I do it in hopes that it may make their lives a bit better, so they don't feel what I do. I wonder if the girl who's picking out some eggs off of the shelf would care if she knew I just prayed that she'd get home safely, and be treated well. Point is, I try to give back. I try my hardest to be a good person, and be happy. But nothing makes me happy. It is a pain so deep. It's so ugly, and cold. I worry that I will never leave this labrynth of suffering. It just f***ing sucks to feel this way. I want nothing more than to leave this pain behind. And now I am almost certain that the only way to do so is by dying. If I didn't have five beautiful sisters, whom I love so much, I would be dead by now. You can be certain of that.  Note from Darlene: If I have not left a comment on your story, please understand that it is not personal; it's just that my hectic schedule no longer permits me to do so.I hope you'll follow me on:  Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in submissions and visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited. Please don't include them, as they will be removed. |