This child abuse story from Kaela page was
created December 19, 2006 and was originally posted on November 24, 2006 as
Kaela is from Kansas, USAIf you've read this page before, check out Kaela's March 20, 2007 update below.
The following child abuse story from Kaela
depicts physical abuse and emotional abuse
The child abuse effects on Kaela: self-harm in the form of cutting her arms and wrists, suicidal tendencies and feelings of despair
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I have always had a rough life, not as rough as
some, but still bad enough to put me in therapy for five years.
When I was barely five months old, my mother
put me in foster care because she wanted cocaine and weed more than she wanted
me. I don't remember my foster parents, but I was told that I was in sixteen
different families over a three-month span.
When I was about nine months old, I was taken
in by my grandparents. My grandmother was the nicest woman you could ever
imagine, but my grandfather was a different story. I lived in fear for years,
too afraid to even walk past him for fear of being hit.
My father was put in prison when I was eight,
and does not get out until a month after I turn eighteen.
I was molested by a classmate when I was only
seven. I was also raped by one of my older sister's friends when I was eleven.
My grandmother died when I was thirteen, and I
was alone with my older brother who is mentally handicapped and my grandfather.
I was beaten daily for almost a year, and he used to scream at me . . . tell me
I was worthless, and ugly, and a disappointment, stuff like that. I would take
the blame for stuff my brother did just so that he might be spared from the
pain I was forced to deal with.
One night, I was alone in my room, crying from
the verbal abuse I'd just been subjected to. I picked up a razor blade and just
started slicing my arms and wrists. For some reason, it made me feel better.
I'd swallow enormous amounts of pain killers, sometimes 40 to 50 at a time, to
try and kill myself. I was hospitalized on one occasion and a man from the
local mental health center came to speak with me. I could not answer all his
questions truthfully, for my grandfather stood right next to me.
This morning, before I went to school, I was screamed at, thrown against the wall, and hit. I am afraid to go home from school everyday and I refuse to tell anyone about my situation at home for fear of a beating from my grandfather. I don't know what I'm supposed to do, but I'm terrified. I am only fourteen and have already been through more than most adults have in their entire lives. I don't know how much longer I can deal with it all . . . .
I received the
following e-mail from Kaela on January 6, 2007, posted with her permission.
Hey . . . this is Kaela . . . .
I don't know if you remember me, but . . . I
posted my story on your site. I'm in a safe place. I thought I'd tell you . . .
it took two broken arms, a broken nose, a black eye and a split lip to make me
see it . . . but I saw that I need help and I got some. I thought you'd want to
I flinch every time someone moves anywhere near
me and I scream when someone raises their hand . . . I feel so stupid for
letting it go on for so long.
I still cut and have to hide my scars . . . my
skin is dark so they show up a lot . . . I wear baggy, dark clothing because I
have self-esteem issues from being called names.
I can't be anywhere near a male or I freak out
. . . this could be either because I was raped or because I was always beat by
men. I was in a foster home for a while, and was molested by the man that was
my foster father. So, I was moved to a new home and put on medication . . . but
. . . all in all . . . I'm happy . . . for the first time in my life, I am
Except for the cutting, I am healing . . . it's
a slow process . . . but . . . I'm healing.
Posted with Kaela's
Hi. This is Kaela. It's been a while since I
have written, but I figured that I'd at least write you every so often to let
you know how things are going.
I'm finishing up my Freshman year with a 4.0
grade average, a boyfriend, and friends that I love more than anything and that
I can trust. I finally feel as though I have escaped most of my past . . . I no
longer cut, though I have a few friends that do, and am almost glad that I
suffered through it because I know that I can help them through it as well.
I love where I'm living, and my high school. I'm
finally home . . . and I'm so happy. I thank you almost every day of my life. You
were the one that convinced me in the end to seek help, and I will be eternally
grateful for that.
No one here really knows about my past, and for
now, I think I'll keep it that way. It's almost like, if they knew, they'd feel
sorry for me, and that isn't what I want.
I'm a headstrong girl, and I know now that I'm
going to make it in life. I'm in FFA, FBLA, FCCLA, choir, and forensics. I play
on the softball team and the track team.
I'll try to keep you more updated, write a
little more . . . not so far apart like I've been doing. Anyways, I hope to
hear back from you and hope that you have been doing as good as I have.
DARLENE: Since the inception of this website and
Stories pages, I have operated with a self-imposed rule that I will not post
any stories from children or youth who are currently not in a safe place. The
story I received from Kaela, and the subsequent communication I had with her,
has made me reconsider my position on this issue.
Every day I receive letters from visitors
asking for information about signs and effects of child abuse. Many are from
people asking me to assess a personal situation for suspected child abuse. I
wish I could answer all of these letters, but I cannot. Posting this child
abuse story from Kaela is intended to help others understand what can happen to
a teen who is being is abused, and what can happen when the teen is too afraid
to report the abuse.
I replied back to Kaela, urging her to seek counseling from the people at Child Help USA. If you're a teen who is being abused, don't let another day go by without getting help for yourself. Please contact Child Help USA at 1-800-4-A-CHILD.
NOTE: Information pages on this site were based on material from the
Canadian Red Cross RespectED Training Program. Written permission was obtained to use their copyrighted material on this site.
Child abuse story from Kaela was re-formatted June 2, 2015
From Victim to Victory
How I got over the devastating effects of child abuse and moved on with my life