This child abuse story from Flick page was
created December 19, 2006 and was originally posted on November 24, 2006 as
Flick is from Swindon, Wiltshire, United
The following child abuse story from Flick
depicts physical abuse, emotional abuse and sexual abuse at the hands of her
The child abuse effects on Flick: self-harm, suicidal thoughts, shame, fear, and anger.
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I was a very young child when my abuse started.
My dad was a manic depressive and this was made worse following his split with
my mum. My mum had left me to live with my dad, as she feared for our lives and
she believed that my dad would have killed us had she tried to take us from
While we lived with him we basically lived in
squalor and my brothers and my sister and I were left to our own devices. We
were made to walk miles to get to his friend's house. This may not seem like
much, but at the ages of 7, 5, 3 and 2 it seemed 100's of miles.
He would regularly beat us, drag us down the
stairs or swing us into walls. Our dog used to suffer as well. My mum went to
court to fight to keep us and she won. We then went to see our dad every other
weekend. He would say to us that there were things watching us through the
curtains and were reporting back to him everything we said. One time my mum
sent us all cards and he said that if we didn't rip them up he would hurt us.
He made us black out the faces of my mum in photographs and hand them to her
and tell her we hated her and if we didn't he would beat us.
My father used to make me play with him. He
would abuse me every weekend that I stayed with him. It was our secret and if I
ever told anyone [he told me that] bad men would come and take me away.
From the age of 6, I was in and out of
counsellor sessions. They knew about everything except the sexual abuse.
Everything else I had told my mum, but the sexual abuse was--and still is--a
From the age of 10, I was self-harming on a
regular basis. It made me feel better. I never felt pain from it, just relief.
I often contemplated suicide, as the memories of my past are still vivid in my
head and are present in my dreams. But when I turned 17, I managed to stop
self-harming. Now it's been more than a year since I intentionally hurt myself.
My mum never blamed us for anything he made us
say to her, and it's thanks to my mum and some other very special people in my
life that I'm no longer depressed.
My memories are a non-visual reminder of what happened all those years ago. My scars have their own story to tell. All I have to say now is that if anyone is being abused you HAVE to tell someone and not live with it on your own. If you are like me, you are probably ashamed, frightened, angry and have a whole range of other emotions stopping you from disclosing, but you have to tell someone, anyone that you trust. Don't let your abusers beat you, you can stop it right now. Please tell someone if you think you are being abused or neglected. You have the right to a happy and safe childhood.
NOTE: Information pages on this site were based on material from the
Canadian Red Cross RespectED Training Program. Written permission was obtained to use their copyrighted material on this site.
Child abuse story from Flick was re-formatted June 1, 2015
From Victim to Victory
How I got over the devastating effects of child abuse and moved on with my life