Child Abuse Stories by Name Undisclosed27

Child Abuse Story From Name Undisclosed27 Part 1

by Name Undisclosed
(Location Undisclosed)

The Truth:
I think my memory of what you would define today as 'abuse' started as early as kindergarten. My story goes like this. My mother (a stay at home mom, middle class home), at the time, did not drive and my father was at work so, she walked me to kindergarten for the first few days and then I was on my own. I walked to school, sometimes it was still dark, by myself. This walk was about a mile or more. At the time, I was a bit over 5 and obviously didn't know any better but there it was.

I was one of three girls and right in the middle. Older sister was 18 months older and younger sister was 9 years younger. My father was a fireman. My mother stayed at home until I got older and she had temp jobs when she felt like working.

My father was and still is an angry, intimidating man who is beyond controlling. My mother was and still is neurotic, emotionally void (unless it serves her), and evil.

My mother and father had a volatile relationship and in short, that meant HELL for my older sister and I, particularly for me. On the outside looking in everything looked great i.e. we had a decent home, a summer home, our presentation was that of a 'solid, unified family'. Not the case.

My childhood was a roller coaster filled with many lows. Because my parents basically always argued and the trust level was never there, it was like living in a hellish home. My father, I feel, never got over losing his ability to openly be the 'player', and my mother married the 'player'.

My mother was 100% a willing submissive wife. I feel that she enjoyed the fact that my father 'owned' her. She knew that he was an over the top hothead, so instead of the focus being on the two of them fighting, she would actually find ways to target my older sister and I. This in turn would take the anger or his wrath from her and put in on my sister and I.

My mother was no saint by any means. She threw anything she could see and throw it at us. Have no idea how I am still here today.

My father was a violent man. He would grab me from my top bunk and with one yank pull me down off of it and I would land right on my lower back. Today as an adult, I have permanent spinal damage. He also enjoyed the 'beating me until I peed on myself and then putting me to bed without food' trick. That was a family favorite of his. He would hold my legs with one hand and beat me with his belt. This went on all throughout my childhood years up into my teens.

And no, if you're curious, my mother never ever lifted a finger to help me or my sister, in fact as I said she typically orchestrated the entire thing.

See Part 2 below.

Darlene Barriere: author. speaker. survivor. coach

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Child Abuse Story From Name Undisclosed27 Part 2

by Name Undisclosed
(Location Undisclosed)

The Truth:
As I got older things only got worse. The only thing that started to become clear to me was that the way they treated me was so wrong. I knew that they didn't have any love for me because if they did they wouldn't treat me the way they did.

I recall being 8 and having a horrible ear infection. My drum ruptured. My father had 100% health coverage and even when I cried for days with ear pain, they did nothing. I was a bother, a nuisance. On the 4th day, my father reluctantly took me to the ear doctor. When the ear doctor looked in my ears he was angry. He asked my father, "Why did you wait this long to get her here. She has such green puss in her ears and her ear drum is ruptured." My father looked over at me and gave me the look of 'you bet you're going to get you're a** kicked when we get home'. I had to have my ear drained and a shot of Penicillin and antibiotics for home. He called me a big baby.

I could spend all night writing about their neglect and abuse but there is something I would like to share with anyone who has suffered through child abuse and are now adults.

When I was about 12 I was up for school (walking) and instead of walking the mile to the bus stop, I turned around and went to the golf course. I saw my older sister look back and keep going. I just kept heading towards the golf course. I walked all the way to the top of the course where I could see the town. I went there because up there it was quiet and peaceful. I sat there all day and just cried in solitude. It wasn't until later that day that a man asked me what I was doing up there and he told me what time it was and I knew I had to get home.

I got home and knew that my parents would know I wasn't in school. As I walked in, my father was home and had gotten off the phone with the school. He said to my mother, "Lock the doors and close all the windows." Of course she did with a smile. My father said to me:"Why didn't you go to school and where were you all day?" I said, "I went to the golf course to just sit." He then smacked me so hard that I fell. Then he started to kick me and punch me. He then screamed at my sister to go upstairs and get his belt. She refused. He then went into the closet and tore some sheets and tied my hands behind my back and my legs. He then kicked me again and I couldn't breathe. I was unable to move from the pain and restraints. When my sister refused to get his belt from upstairs, he went up instead. At that moment I saw a wave of a white light go across my head and up and I felt the sheets loosen on my hands. I wiggled and got my hands free and then my legs. I could hear my father coming down the stairs and I ran for the back door. I will never forget my older sister saying, "Run, just run." I ran and he ran after me.

Suffice it to say that today I have nothing to do with them. My 2 sisters incredibly have a convenient memory of a wonderful childhood. You see, my parents have a few dollars and my sisters enjoy that money, i.e. gifts, trips, tax troubles, jewelry, clothing, furniture. They want the money and will do and say anything to keep it and get it all when the 2 crazies die.

What I find so ironic is how God plays in all of this. I have chronic health issues (some from the continuous beatings, i.e. impact on my spine, medical care deprived and not to mention how, unlike my 2 sisters, I was always treated like I didn't exist.

It wasn't until I became a mother and adult married woman, that my mother revealed to me that I was "the result of a broken condom". I guess I will never forget those words, but it explained so much to me. My thought was why didn't she have an abortion?
My family will backstab, lie, cheat and pit their children at each other to win their attention. I don't want nor do I need that in my life. As a child I had no choice, but as an adult I do. I have had self esteem issues, confidence issues and can oftentimes retreat from social settings. I tend to be a loner and spend time with my husband, daughter and dog.

I believe that anyone who treats children this way will one way or another pay. WE (the victims) may not see it, but there will be some form of justice served. My younger sister today is a counselor for addictions. She has her masters in psychology and I had a hand in raising her. I absolutely loved and adored my little sister.

I read an e-mail that she sent my mother saying that she thinks I look at life in a "skewed" fashion and that I am complicated, and being involved with me means getting hurt. I tell ya I was beyond crushed. She took my pain and not only diminished it but made it non-existent and she did this because if she acknowledged it she would lose $$$$$$ from my parents. This made me sick for months. I feel and felt so betrayed and it all came to me.

A few months ago my sister was diagnosed with M.S. She is without a doubt my parents' Pride and Joy. She is struggling with M.S. I don't see or speak to any of them, but every now and again a friend or relative will mention them to me. When I heard the news about my younger sister, at first I cried because I know what it is to be sick and feel so isolated and alone in your misery. But then it hit me: My parents always treated my little sister like she was a princess and blatantly made no attempt of hiding that she was their favorite, and now she is ill. They have to watch her fight, they have to watch her struggle. When I struggled with health issues of thyroid, disc, hysterectomy, they were angry and said, "We are not coming to help" and hung up on my husband (I'm leaving out the profanity on their part). But this is for their Pride and Joy.

I'm hoping that my sister can cope and live a normal life with this, but I know that this in some way is God's justice. She made light of my physical health and basically insinuated that I am unstable. Pretty interesting how the person who called me unstable and that my health was sensationalized etc. is now ill. How's that for Karma. My parents money can't help this and their lies can't help this either.

I'm not happy about this just seeing it as how our higher power works. You can never 'pretend' that crimes were not committed when they were. You can never dismiss operations like hysterectomies, spinal fusion, thyroidectomies, blood clots. My family has done this to me and as an adult I'm done with all of them.

My elderly grandmother says to me, "Let them go, all you need is your husband and your daughter and God. They will pay for everything and more someday, it's coming." I don't care what happens to any of them other than leaving me in peace to live my own life. I have been going to counseling and it helps. It also helps to have the love and support of those around you and I have that as well.

I wish all and any the very best because there is always hope. I refuse to let what happened to me as a child, a teen and a young adult destroy any more time that I have here on earth. I am trying to work through this and let it go so that I can move on with some sort of a healthy life. God Bless and thank you :)