Child Abuse Story From Mary4
by Mary
(Oregon, USA)
This is my story, I don't write all that well, but I remember most of what happened like it was yesterday. Most of the early abuse happened when we move to the country and it was always done outside. I figured that she wanted to shame me somehow by doing it in the open even though there was no one around.
I was seven when I have my first memory. If anything, it happened before that...I don't remember. My mother took me out to the chicken coop when we first moved there and I was excited that she had got me chickens. While feeding them she unbuttoned my pants and fondled me. She told me if I was good for her that she would get me a horse. It was only a short period of time before oral sex was performed outside by the chicken coop. Of course I didn't know why she was doing this. In fact I still don't understand why. I know shortly after this she took away my underwear and told me I wasn't to wear them anymore. I spent my time only allowed to wear a t-shirt. She would fondle me throughout the day and perform oral sex on me. If people visited, I was not allowed to dress. She would tell them I was her little nudist. If I tried to go to my room to hide she would drag me out and tell me to be friendly to our company.
Being a naked 7- 8-year-old girl around strangers opened up opportunities for others to abuse me as well, and my mother seemed to encourage any advances anyone would make towards me. Even though I hated being constantly touched and used by people, I never told or wanted to reveal my shame. I'm glad I could write about it here.
 Note from Darlene: I regret that I can no longer continue the practice of commenting on visitor submissions to the degree I have in the past, as I am currently writing a book on healing from child abuse. I ask that you please read my post of June 24, 2009 titled Announcement Regarding my Comments for a complete explanation. I welcome you to follow my progress on my Facebook page at Healing from Child Abuse. When you get there, don't forget to click onto the Become a Fan link. I do hope to hear from you there.
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Child Abuse Story From Mary4 Part 2
by Mary4
(Oregon, USA)
I want to tell Darlene that her support meant a lot. I've read other stories here were the mothers were physically abusive and I must say what I went through may not have been as bad as being beaten. I would request that Darlene include mother-daughter incest and woman child sex abuse in her book. There is not enough attention given to this and I'd like to see it addressed. Thanks again for this site and for you. I'd like to submit a couple more events that occurred that I have strong feelings about if that is ok, and to give people that have gone through this kind of incest something to relate to, as I have found very little.
At home I wore little to nothing all the time, but when we needed to go to shop for food, malls, movies, any outside activity I would usually wear a knee length dress. I still wore no underwear.
One day on our way back home just before we hit the dirt road that led to our house, my mother reached over and began to rub her hand up and down my leg pushing my dress up. She reached up in between my legs and I opened them as I had been taught. When we hit the dirt road it was still about 4 miles to our house with several homes on the way. It was then my mother told me to strip. I took off my dress and looked over at her. She had one hand on the wheel and the other in between her legs. I remember thinking, god she can't even wait to get me home. Now, I had to do something for my mother from time to time. She would tell me to stand for her. If she was on the couch or in her bed I would stand next to her and she would look at me while she masturbated, or I would lay next to her with my head near her feet and my legs apart. I realized that this was one of those times so I leaned against the car door and opened my legs so she could look at me while she masturbated. She would look forward and then look at me as she drove down the road. When we came to our property she stopped the car and finished herself.
The other time this happened was a couple of years later when I had turned 9. She started getting fresh with me on the way home. When we came to the dirt road she ordered me to take off my dress. Once again she was masturbating, except this time when we got about a mile from our house she told me to get out and walk the rest of the way. I told her no but she eventually got her way and I began walking with nothing on but a pair of shoes. When we got to the gate she pulled up alongside of me. By this time I was in tears but she didn't care. She just said to me, "Show it to me." I tried, leaned back, moved my legs apart but it wasn't good enough. She told me to lie down on the road and spread my legs. The road was full of rocks and they hurt when I laid down and they were hot because it was summer, but I did what she told me, sobbing through the whole thing. When she was done she allowed me to get up and get in the car.
Note from Darlene: I regret that I can no longer continue the practice of commenting on visitor submissions to the degree I have in the past, as I am currently writing a book on healing from child abuse. I ask that you please read my post of June 24, 2009 titled Announcement Regarding my Comments for a complete explanation. I welcome you to follow my progress on my Facebook page at Healing from Child Abuse. When you get there, don't forget to click onto the Become a Fan link. I do hope to hear from you there.
Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited, and could result in being banned from making further comments on this site.
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Child Abuse Story From Mary4 Part 3
by Mary4
(Oregon, USA)
Darlene, thank you for including mother-daughter incest in your book. I felt a scourge of energy when I read that. Although I don't feel I need any kind of therapy, because I will make it just fine, your comments meant the world. Someone asked if I was now an adult. Yes I'm an adult now, I'm 19 years old. The abuse was so recent to me that it's very vivid in my mind, although I do sometimes get confused with some of the events.
I also want to say that writing about what happened to me has been a blessing and has been very, very difficult. It's difficult because I have to relive events I'd rather not remember and it's difficult because my spelling is so bad that I have to look up lots of words before I write them.
Most of the abuse only happened for about three years and then only a couple times after that.
When I turned ten the state required me to take a test to see how I was progressing. I did poorly on the test and the state wanted my mother to send me to school instead of homeschooling me. My mother put off sending me to school till I was eleven but decide I needed to attend when the state retested me to see if I had improved on the other scores. At this point my mother stopped doing anything to me at all.
It wasn't until I was almost 14 and was at my best friend's house that my friend decided that I should dress differently. I usually wore long dresses down to my ankles or pants, I exposed myself enough already and was somewhat shy about wearing skimpy clothes. My best friend let me try on some of her clothes and then gave me a short skirt and low cut top. I wore them when my mother picked me up from her house.
On the way home my mother was pissed. She started questioning me about the clothes. Why was I wearing them, why did she give them to me, did I change in front of her. When we got home she started accusing me of sleeping with my friend. Did you sleep with her? Did you take your clothes off in front of her? I kept telling her over and over again, no, no, no. She then said something that made me feel 8 years old again. "If you're going to sleep to with her, you can sleep with me too." That's when she sat down on my bed beside me and began to unbutton the top. I remember begging her to stop. "Please mommy don't, I didn't do anything." Needless to say she did it to me and made me do it to her. I thank god that there was only one other time after this.
Note from Darlene: I regret that I can no longer continue the practice of commenting on visitor submissions to the degree I have in the past, as I am currently writing a book on healing from child abuse. I ask that you please read my post of June 24, 2009 titled Announcement Regarding my Comments for a complete explanation. I welcome you to follow my progress on my Facebook page at Healing from Child Abuse. When you get there, don't forget to click onto the Become a Fan link. I do hope to hear from you there.
Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited, and could result in being banned from making further comments on this site.
Click here to read or post comments.
Child Abuse Story From Mary4 Part 4
by Mary4
(Oregon, USA)
There were several things my mother did that I considered pure torture. Besides being paraded around in front of people nude, which I hated, she did one thing to me that really upset me. She would either start masturbating me or licking me and then when she knew I was close to having an orgasm she'd stop, tell me that was enough for now and walk away. Later, I'd say an hour or so, she'd repeat the process stopping just as I was getting close to orgasm. This would be repeated several times over the next few hours until I would reach out and grab her hand back as she tried to stop or try to push her head back down. She'd pull away and wait for me to ask her to continue. She'd tell me if I wanted it I'd have to ask nice. She'd literally make me beg her to finish me. I'd be so frustrated by the constant stimulation and stopping that I would lay there and beg her lick me. When she finished me I'd be filled with relief, only to be followed by total disgust and shame at myself for wanting it and begging her for it.
Note from Darlene: I regret that I can no longer continue the practice of commenting on visitor submissions to the degree I have in the past, as I am currently writing a book on healing from child abuse. I ask that you please read my post of June 24, 2009 titled Announcement Regarding my Comments for a complete explanation. I welcome you to follow my progress on my Facebook page at Healing from Child Abuse. When you get there, don't forget to click onto the Become a Fan link. I do hope to hear from you there.
Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited, and could result in being banned from making further comments on this site.
Click here to read or post comments.
Child Abuse Story From Mary4 Part 5
by Mary4
(Oregon, USA)
I thought I might help those like myself and become a foster parent. What I discovered is that in this state children are removed but they focus heavily on reunification, (giving kids back to their abusers). They believe that these people can change their ways after attending some classes. Some bleeding heart liberal who thinks abusers should have some rights. Anyway the cold weather has brought back a lot of memories. I remember the cold because in the morning is when I went out to feed the animals, it was cold and usually raining. I would put on my waist lenght coat and shoes and would go out to do my chores. Mother usually was with me. I remember being very cold and when mother would put her warm hands on me it was welcome, even when those hands went where they shouldn't. I remember being wet from the rain one time and mother unsiped my coat and removed it. I was cold and she layed me down on the wet muddy ground. I was totally miseralbe. But mother controlled my body and soon she brought me away from the cold mentally and I soon began to respond, thus letting her know she was now in charge of my body as though it were hers. When it ended I was now freezing again, mother helped me up a took me to the house where I had to stay outside till she could run a warm bath. Mother had taken me through a range of emotion, cold, satisfaction, to comfort all within an hour. This situation was not unique, she just found different ways of taking control of me.
 Note from Darlene: I welcome you to follow me on my Facebook page at Healing from Child Abuse. When you get there, don't forget to click onto the Become a Fan link. I hope to hear from you there! Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in submissions and visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited. Please don't include them, as they will be removed.
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Child Abuse Story From Mary4 Part 6
by Mary4
(Oregon, USA)
I have read many many stories on this site and was hoping to find something similar to my story. It is time for me to move forward now but I'd like to relate one more story.
I've taked about how mother controlled my body and my emotions. She also lived her fantasy's through me using me as her exhibitonish and her as the voyeur. Lakes pools and beaches where I was stripped in public to change clothes. Special beaches we went to where clothing was optional. I would say half my abuse occured outside in some form or another. Mother would befriend people at these places and use suntan lotion as a means of getting perfit strangers to touch me. There was one woman that mother befriended, where from I have no Idea. She came to the house and she had a two year old daughter. Janet was alway touchey feeley, rubbing her hand on my bare bum, running her hand up and down my leg. If I tried to resist her touch mother would correct me and tell me to be nice. It was only a short time after I met her that I was told to take Janet and show her my room. Janet brought mother the diaper bag and told her to change the baby. I remember her asking, how far can I go. I also remember mother telling me very sternly, to be a good girl for Janet. I know that I'd been through alot already as I was already 8, but I remember being terrified as we walked to my room. When Janet closed the door behind her I remember being extremely scared. Janet sat down on my bed and began to rub her hands all over me. She then placed my hand inside her shirt and rubbed my hand on her breasts. I remember being laid on the bed and I know it was done to me and I remember feeling pain in my behind that I had not felt before. Mother never penitrated me but I think Janet did. I'm sure there was more but I mostly remember shaking and being very cold, like I was dead. I have now related what I consider to be the worst of my experiences. I will do my best to cope, do my best throughout what is truely a short life, even though often it does not feel that way. I hope each of you find your own way, treat everyone the way you'd wish to be treated, stop dwelling and start enjoying.
Mary
Note from Darlene: I welcome you to follow me on my Facebook page at Healing from Child Abuse. When you get there, don't forget to click onto the Become a Fan link. I hope to hear from you there! Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in submissions and visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited. Please don't include them, as they will be removed.
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Child Abuse Story From Mary4 Part 8
by Mary
(Oregon, USA)
I'd like to thank all of you for the info. I do not know why I feel the need to understand what my mother did but I do, so this will help. I have made a decision to tell mother to leave me alone or I will go to the authorities. I don't think she will be to worried as it was a long time ago and I have no proof. I'm sure she still has nude photo's of me and the others but I'm sure they are well hidden. Although this is a difficult story for me I will retell it. Mother took me to places where you didn't have to wear clothes. Nudiest places. Not all the time but one in a while. The children wore a bracelet. Green you could take pictures, yellow you had to ask and red was no. Mother always had me wear yellow. This place had a playground and a lake and was quite large, at least to a young person. I was playing and a man came up with his young child, still in diapers. I played with her and mother and him talked. He asked if he could take a picture of me, mother agreed and wanted to take pictures too. They took us down to the lake and he took some and then mother asked him if he'd remove his daughters diaper for the pictures. Anyway we went back to his RV for more pictures and I was first to go and watched mother remove the diaper and fondle the girl while I was being photographed. All I can say was that he was my first male experience, I can not bring myself to go into detail as to what happened I can not talk about the child only to say that I did things I shouldn't have and that is all I can say. I know it wasn't my fault but the fact that there was some enjoyment in what I did is what makes me so sick.
Note from Darlene: If I have not left a comment on your story, please understand that it is not personal; it's just that my hectic schedule no longer permits me to do so.I hope you'll follow me on:  Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in submissions and visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited. Please don't include them, as they will be removed.
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