Child Abuse Story From Greg Part 2
by Greg
(Colorado, USA)
"I wish you were never born" was yelled at me by my mom as I was growing up. She blamed me for her not going to college and dropping out of high school after becoming pregnant with me. When I was doing my homework or reading out loud to her she would tell me how "stupid" I was and would get so upset with me she would walk away in disgust. I never heard the words "I love you". Instead I heard: "The sight of you makes me puke", "I don't even like looking at you" (because I looked like my dad). "You lazy ass. You're just like your dad."
The worst is when she encouraged my step-father to "beat him like he's never been beat before." I was 10 years old then, and had smacked my 4-year-old half-brother when he hit me in the face with a rock which might have broke my nose. (Wonder where I learned that behavior). Bill didn't disappoint her. She didn't even help me with my bleeding, probably-broken nose before I was beaten into submission. I woke up from this beating with my step-brother helping me with my nose and my backside.
I felt like I was just a thorn in her side until my step-father left. After that she treated me better, but I never really felt I was loved by her. I think she treated my step-brother and I better after Bill left because she needed us to take care of our younger brothers, not because she loved us. Oh, by the way Mom- I graduated from college while working full time. Guess I must not have been that stupid!!
It's a good thing I had an older step-brother who encouraged and taught me and was there to help me throughout my life. Without him, I would have been lost and would not have known what it means to be loved. We talk about our childhood and wonder how we became who we are. We formed a bond throughout the years and believe neither one could have made it without each other.
See
Part 1 of Greg's story.
Note from Darlene: The volume of contributor submissions has now made it impossible for me to comment personally (especially in great detail) on each and every contribution. If I haven't left you a comment or one that is in-depth, please do not take my lack of a personal response as a slight, or as a statement that your story is somehow unworthy of my time.
Nothing, and I do mean
nothing, could be further from the truth. If there was a way for me to respond to all of you at length, I would.
Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited, and could result in being banned from making further comments on this site.
Child Abuse Story From Greg
by Greg
(Colorado, USA)
I'm a 29-year-old male who is still hurting. My mom had me when she was 17 and I never knew my father. Before I was 4 we lived with my grandma and things were O.K. but then she met Bill who had a 7-year-old and we moved away from where my grandma and other family members were. I also have 2 younger half brothers who were born when I was 5.
My first real memory with Bill was in our new house in Austin, Texas. My step-brother and I were playing in the house and we knocked over something and broke it. My innocence was lost that night. Bill was screaming at us and I could see evil in his eyes. Ken, my step-brother had seen this before and knew what was coming. He made me sit on the couch while Ken stripped and was beaten with a belt for what seemed like forever. Then it was my turn. I fought and screamed like any 5-year-old. He grabbed the back of my neck and slammed me into the wall and gave me the first of many beatings throughout my childhood, but this is the one that haunts me in my nightmares. My mother, who I adored, watched this happen and didn't stop it.
Soon after this, while I still had scars and welts from the first beating, my step-brother Ken and I were playing and we did something that pissed Bill off. I remember that I felt I was blameless in some way and cried and protested that I didn't do anything wrong. This was the wrong thing to do with Bill, and made the beating even worse. This time he beat me until I passed out, and according to my step-brother who had to watch, he continued beating me after I passed out. After this time I did as I was told without question, and whether I did something wrong or not, I would take my beating up until age 12.
I remember during these years I was always in pain and my butt, small of my back and backs of my legs always had bruises or welts on them. It became normal and I just accepted it. You think someone would have noticed what my step-brother and I were going through, but neither one of us remember anyone questioning us, and Bill knew just where to beat us.
When I was 12 and my step-brother 14 and my half-brothers were 7, I guess my mom decided that the cycle had to stop. My half-brothers had never got a beating up until this point but were still forced to watch us get our beatings. We had all gone to the lake to go swimming and were very late getting home which was normal but we were even later than normal and this put Bill into a rage. Things went like they always did, first Ken, then me, but then all hell broke loose. My half-brother Jake was to be next but my mother told him no and started fighting with him and he smacked her hard and she flew across the room. She told him to get out and he left. He was out of the house for good and we only saw him from time to time until he died from liver cancer when I was 17.
This incident ended the abuse for me and my step-brother and prevented my half-brothers from getting beat, but I am still angry with my mother for not sticking up for me or my step-brother. To her, it was O.K. for Bill to beat us black and blue and beat us to the point that we passed out but it wasn't O.K. for him to do this to my two younger siblings? Does she love them more than us?? Were we not worth the same as them? I've dealt with these questions ever since that day. I have asked her these questions, and all she can say is sorry. Well Mom, that's not good enough. I know you were in a bad situation but you allowed this to happen to me and your allowing it to happen was condoning it. I can't get myself to the point to forgive her. It is just too much for me to handle.
Note from Darlene: The volume of contributor submissions has now made it impossible for me to comment personally (especially in great detail) on each and every contribution. If I haven't left you a comment or one that is in-depth, please do not take my lack of a personal response as a slight, or as a statement that your story is somehow unworthy of my time. Nothing, and I do mean nothing, could be further from the truth. If there was a way for me to respond to all of you at length, I would.
Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited, and could result in being banned from making further comments on this site.
