Child Abuse By the System

by Mark
(New York, USA)

How would you like to have your 14 yr old daughter come to you after years of mental abuse at the hands of her mom and finally confide in you that mom has been hitting her for years across the face repeatedly. Mom puts her outside in the breezeway at night in her pj's as punishment, and takes away her homework for hours at a time knowing that her 95 student will not go to school without it completed. Two weeks ago mom took it from her at 11pm only to give it back at 1am after our daughter begged for two hours. She now stayed up till 3 am to finish and go to school with three hours of sleep. One day later she missed two days of school not feeling well. Our daughter said that she never came to us in fear that mom would find out and that her punishment from mom would be more severe. We started the process of calling our lawyer and the useless Law Guardian for the kids. The Law Guardian had us wait till the following week for her apt book to open up and for our next "visit" with our kids. Thru several sleepless nights we assured my daughter that the court system will protect her. After one of many horrific nights my daughter went to school and called me from school on Nov 23 begging me to please call the courts now, I can't go back to mom's house. I immediately came home from work and met my daughter and son after school in which she again described the mental and physical abuse taking place in the house. She was in fear of ever being alone with her mom again and we assured her without supervision that will not happen. Court on Monday was suppose to be a ground ball, mom beating her daughter, putting a child in the winter outside at night, constant pathological warfare with both kids, 9 lawyers(mom), bankruptcy(mom), parental alienation in the worst possible manner, and a history in the courts with the same judge that has stated many times that mom is a liar. Judge wanted to see both kids in court on Monday so there we sat for hours until he spoke to both daughter and son. My daughter came out in total disbelief as the first thing the judge asked her was what grade are you in? He had before him a paper she had written describing some of the mental anguish she faces daily with mom and the peaceful environment she has with her dad and how she wants to live with her dad. He corrected her paper grammatically and spell checked it. He said to her "this is the kind of work your doing in 9th grade?" She informed him it was only a rough draft and not meant for anyone's eyes except her teacher. He joked with her about mom's soups, stated mom is a bright woman, and have you been on R--'s( my employer) plane yet with your dad? My daughter informed the judge as to the conditions she constantly lives in, begging him not to send her back to mom for the retribution will be severe now that she has come forward. He informed her that she will probably go back to her mom that night and that the hitting on the face is "PARENTAL DISCIPLINE"!!!. She said to him-anything happens to my little brother and its your responsibility-his reply "I HAVE BIG SHOULDERS". Telling a child coming to you for protection that you can handle the outcome-WOW. She was floored as were we. After eight hours of waiting the judge finally sat at the bench and his first words were how he was disturbed that we have a twelve year old that has missed a birthday party because of the Dad's actions. I stated to him I would never put a party in front of my son and daughter's well being and that these are serious charges on my daughter's behalf. With both children in the courtroom and mom and her 9th lawyer standing there trying to defend her mental capacity, my daughter with tears in her eyes sat there and said to everyone "are you people not listening to me?" I WANT TO LIVE WITH MY DAD!!! The judge gave them a reprieve after speaking to them once again in the back chambers allowing them to stay with us from Monday to Friday morning this week only. But he punished the mom by taking away our weekend and giving it to her so they do not sleep again in our house till Dec 16th. My daughter and son can't even communicate freely with us as her cell, ipod,and internet access is cut off. She and her brother are allowed a quick phone call to their dad unless mom determines differently and we go without. We had to set up a code word with my daughter to say on the phone if the violence gets too bad! Yes, CPS has been notified, Yes, their school is on notice by us and my daughter, Yes, my daughter has called her useless Law Guardian to be told curtly on the phone, "call the judge for what? He already made his decision and you have to stick by it". I beg anyone from this corrupt dysfunctional court system to lay next to my daughter at night as she cries herself to sleep and tell her she should feel safe, and it will be okay as I have to do. My daughter told me how the last week has been a tease and she got to feel good again and how mom has taken any life and enjoyment from her. My daughter telling me how she couldn't go anywhere with her mom telling everyone how horrible her dad is-doctors,teachers,neighbors, friend's parents, you name them. If she spoke up in private to her mom she was punished. My daughter's words last night to us were "I HOPE I STILL GET HIT SO SOMEONE WILL FINALLY LISTEN TO ME"!!! So we dropped them off at school today and say a prayer and hope for the best. CAN YOU IMAGINE?





Darlene Barriere: author. speaker. survivor. coachNote from Darlene: If I have not left a comment on your story, please understand that it is not personal; it's just that my hectic schedule no longer permits me to do so.

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Comments for Child Abuse By the System

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Jan 04, 2012
Mark:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

So disheartening to hear that the judge calls face-slapping "parental discipline". And then making an I've got "big shoulders" statement if something untoward happens. What a piece of work he is; making children second class citizens. Children and youth have no rights, not as long as such ignorance remains on the bench. Reminds me of that judge who beat his teenage daughter with a belt and dared her to put the videotape of if on YouTube, claiming he was in the right and that he would be applauded for "disciplining" his daughter for doing something illegal (downloading songs from the Internet). But he found out that public outcry was a lot greater than he would have ever expected...and he was consequently suspended from the bench, a bench he held as a judge of children, no less. Go up the chain of command, Mark. Go to your local and state representatives, and keep being an advocate for your daughter. I send you and your daughter love, light and positive energy. Thank you for sharing your daughter's story with my visitors and me.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir

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