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Child Abuse - A Case of Incest and Sexual Exploitation

by Ruth B
(Abuja, Nigeria)

I write this with a very heavy heart and tearful eyes. Why would a man let the fatherly love and compassion he should have for his daughter be replaced with so much lust that he has to have sexual relations with her? Why??? As the Youth Officer of WOTCLEF (Women Trafficking and Child Labor Eradication Foundation), I have seen, heard and experienced stuff, but this one, it broke me down.

We just got a report that a man has been sleeping with his daughter for the past three years. As though that was not enough, the girl introduces her cousin who is only 17 years old. This man bought the innocence and dignity of these girls with “Goodies”; he gives this little girl gala, can Maltina and N100 daily to take to school. He also drops her at school by himself. This man sleeps with the two girls in a row almost on a daily basis while the wife is away doing her fruit business. To cover his atrocities he purchased contraceptives for them to use before the act.

Once when the wife caught him with her brother’s daughter, all she said was “Go to your room and don’t do this again.” What does this tell you? The woman was fully aware of the evil going on in her house and did not say a word to anyone about it.

Why do mothers decide to be blind and deaf to the realities in our world today while the men in our promiscuous society defile and exploit these girls and sometimes boys??? Avoiding the Shame and protecting the “good” Name of the so called family “Head.” Yes, that is what they believe they are doing. Who will protect these children if the same adults they trust and are responsible for their welfare are the ones who violate them and pollute their innocence?

How can a girl who has been through these be the same again? How will she draw together herself again? Her dignity, self respect and esteem, and self worth has been tampered with. She begins to feel like a commodity. She gets the notion that in life you only get what you need or want by giving away something. Need I remind you at this juncture that all the things such men offer to these children are actually their rights? Their right to be educated, to survive, to develop, to enjoy leisure and recreational activities. By the virtue of the Child's Right Act, they should be provided these things without having to give anything in return.

We have the law but we must implement it to the later for us to enjoy its efficacy. How can we achieve that? We must all shine our eyes and ask questions when we smell something fishing between a man and the girl in the house. We must all come out and talk whenever we hear of or notice such occurrences. The Government cannot do it alone; neither can the child protection NGOs.




Darlene Barriere: author. speaker. survivor. coachNote from Darlene: If I have not left a comment on your story, please understand that it is not personal; it's just that my hectic schedule no longer permits me to do so.

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E-book: Victim To Victory

From Victim to Victory
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How I got over the devastating effects of child abuse and moved on with my life

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