Whether you've been blindsided or knocked down—emotionally, physically, or financially, this can put you in a negative place. Adversity can make you weaker—but it can also make you stronger. We invite you to a Free online speaker series starting May 22 where you will discover that you can Rebound With Resilience and emerge stronger! Take advantage of the Free Gifts also! Don't wait! Reserve your seat now & get the interviews delivered right to your inbox everyday for 2 weeks! 

Comments for All Too Familiar

Click here to add your own comments

Feb 10, 2015
David:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

You certainly are not alone. And while I understand that knowing this can be comforting, I also understand how it can be so very disturbing. After all, there are just so many who are suffering.

You've likely heard the saying, "What we resist persists." That applies to shame as well. For whatever reason, you have a spanking fetish. It is highly likely that came about as a result of what you endured at the hands of your misguided mother. Parents don't accept, even today, that when they spank their children, they not only set them up for future abuse and a host of other long term problems, they ALSO run the risk of creating a sexual desire that is tied into shame. Sexual arousal is very close to what we experience as children when we are about to be punished in a physical way. That area of the body holds so many nerve endings, and they are directly tied into sexual feelings. It's not at all unusual for spankings to create sexual desire. This happens a great deal more than parents care to acknowledge. Parents who are hell-bent on spanking for discipline refuse to accept this as a very real possibility.

So where does that leave the now-adult child who wants to get rid of those sexual desires? Confused and in some cases, tormented.

An urge to be spanked doesn't have to be riddled with shame. When it is, it's because the person is still harbouring a great deal of shame over the punishment received as a child. The trick is to deal with the shame (humiliation, etc) associated with what happened as a child.

David, your sexuality--that is, your desire to be spanked--doesn't have to be shame-filled. When you truly deal with what your mother did to you and the emotions that were triggered as a result, you may be able to see your sexual urge in a more positive light. But if you hold judgement over those urges, the shame will never be released.

I send you love, light and healing energy, David. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Write Your Child Abuse Story.

Return to All Too Familiar

Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge the child abuse
stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
heard and validated with the needs of my visitors.



E-book: Victim To Victory

From Victim to Victory
a memoir

How I got over the devastating effects of child abuse and moved on with my life

Read more...

Most Recent

  1. Talking is Healing

    May 19, 17 10:20 AM

    I was abused long time ago. I just recently got caught for meth, part of my abusive behavior to my self, plus drinking. Finally got counseling. She showed

    Read More

  2. A Broken Heart

    May 16, 17 04:20 PM

    Where do I start? It all started at- well, I don't even really remember the age exactly, I just know it was before the age of just 5 years old. Can you

    Read More

  3. Journey of Pain

    May 08, 17 10:51 AM

    I will start by telling you how I became aware of my trauma. It started with a friend always speaking of how wonderful a book was. I was wondering why

    Read More

E-book: Victim To Victory

From Victim to Victory
a memoir

How I got over the devastating effects of child abuse and moved on with my life

Read more...